I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
