This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize