hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
