We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
