I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
