This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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