the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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