The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
There are leaves in my underwear?
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