Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
