R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
