party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Operation Purity has been aborted
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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