Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
