I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Your penis caused this!
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
