I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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