im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize
