my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize