Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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