And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
