just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
