Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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