I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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