Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Randomize
