part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
