while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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