are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize