I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
