Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize