let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
