oh god the rape fog is back!
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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