ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize