that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize