Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
