i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
