I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
