people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
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