i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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