One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
