Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Actions speak louder than pants.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
