Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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