I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Randomize
