Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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