I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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