Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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