it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
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