I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
