She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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