would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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