I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
