Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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