....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
