I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
stop calling my apartment porn island.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
