I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
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